a little space i call my own

like i say, don't regret knowing me

today, i woke up, with a heavy head...
knowing it's sunday, i tried to go on sleeping like a dead...
but instead, i let my thoughts run wild...
thoughts, that i fear most, would happen only in fairy tales...

and fairy tales, my fellow mates...
truely is, are, nothing but lies...
slap me if you want, hit me till i fly...
i don't care, for i shall hold my stand...

i don't wish to please everyone, it would be hard...
but pleasing the one deserving it, it's like the "eh, bee, and see"...
but, that's not the thought i had in mind...
for the thought is, is anyone mine?

i went on to ponder, subconsciously...
did anyone regret, knowing me...
i wasn't sure, why such a thought...
maybe i felt, my life's like a fraud...

so do me a favour, please please please...
clarify my doubts, will do thee...
but let's not trouble you, no no...
for you guys, are busy bees...

the next thought, is quite bizarre...
just as messy as, the early pasar...
and i hope, i can confess to a pastor...
for i'm sure, having this thought, this feeling, is definitely wrong...

so i believe, i've sinned...
but feelings such such, couldn't be just alone me...
okay, be it one sided or not, it CAN just be me...
oh god, please, i have a confession to make...

and did i say, fish has the ability to self forgive?
and so he did, he forgot about it soon enough...
till now, it came back, just like a tsunami...
then, he felt so bad, he can't sleep anymore...

for what purpose, for this thought to persist...
it held no meaning, no way it can be...
disappointment my friends, *shakes the head...
make my heart drop, just like the trip to hell...

things that are hard to get, the most precious...
a belief of mine, that has proved quite a mistake...
but a habit, it has become...
and this belief, cost me dearly...

i prefer having her long term, really...
then to having her, for a short period of time...
but i know, she won't be around any longer...
i'll make sure, it's a sweet and short period...

and yes people who know me, i seldom hold up to my words...
for this once, i hope i can be real...

=)

looking ahead, i see this glimpse of light, glowing and dimming, just like the morse code i've learnt, just to spell out her name...